Take Divali to School in a Jiffy

A happy belated Divali, Dhanteras, Kali Chaudas, Bestu Varas, and Bhai Beej to you all!  I hope that you all enjoyed the holiday with your families.

I absolutely love Divali time because it brings back fond memories of my parents’ Divali poojas and parties.  The friends, family, food, and the warm glow of the divas were all magical.

Did you ever create rangolis like this?  Did you make one this year? 

 

As Indian American Toddler gets older, I want to share these special holidays with him too.  But with work and other obligations, I can’t go the full 9 yards like my parents did.

One easy way I found to celebrate Divali was to share activities and food with Indian American Toddler’s daycare class.

I know, I know, you’re thinking, “I barely have time to get through the normal workweek, let alone plan a big shindig for my kid’s class.”

But folks, this is easy peasy.  I promise.

STEP 1: Google “Divali pictures to color.”

STEP 2: Pick a picture, and underneath write a sentence or two about the significance of Divali.

Diwali activities for kids  by our kids  HAVE A HAPPY DIWALI

Here is the picture I used.

STEP 3: Print copies for the class or have the teacher make copies at school.  The kids can color the picture with crayons or markers.

STEP 4: Buy freeze dried mangos at Trader Joe’s.  Nut-free, prepackaged, no sugar added.  All the moms will love you.  They taste like candy so the kids will love you too.

Trader Joe's Freeze Dried Mango Unsweetened & Unsulfured 1.7oz

The freeze dried mango packets look like this.

STEP 5:  Play your air guitar.  You’re a rock star mom who just threw together a Divali celebration.

Now you may be thinking, “But Divali’s already passed.  Isn’t it too late to do this?”  Nope.  Unlike Christmas and Thanksgiving, most people don’t know the actual date of Divali, so it won’t seem untimely even if you celebrate it after the fact.  So what are you waiting for?  Plan your celebration today.

How did you celebrate Divali?  Can you share any tips with us other moms on how to pull together a celebration?

 

A Historic Moment: Senate Hearing on Hate Crimes & Counting Sikhs

On September 19, 2012, I was honored to be able to attend the U.S. Senate’s Hearing on Hate Crimes and the Threat of Domestic Extremism.  Here is a link to the hearing video.

Hate Crimes Hearing before U.S. Senate

Members of Sikh and Other Communities Attend Senate Hate Crimes Hearing

The hearing was convened, in part, in response to the Oak Creek Gurudwara shooting.  One of the goals of the hearing was to have the FBI commit to tracking data on hate crimes committed against Sikhs.  From what I’ve learned here in Washington, collecting data about a problem is crucial in changing government policy about it (read why Complainers are American Heroes here).

Photos of the shooting victims were displayed at the hearing.

I was shocked to learn that even though numerous hate crimes have been committed against U.S. Sikhs, including the heinous murder of Balbir Singh Sodhi in the immediate aftermath of 9/11 (his killer wanted revenge against someone he thought looked like a terrorist), the FBI is not currently counting hate crimes against Sikhs.

At the hearing, Senators heard testimony from several individuals, including Harpreet Singh Saini, a son of one of the shooting victims, Paramjit Kaur Saini. This brave young man moved the hearing room to tears with his powerful words, “I want to tell the gunman who took her from me: You may have been full of hate, but my mother was full of love.”

Harpreet described the problem perfectly:

“Senators, I came here today to ask the government to give my mother the dignity of being a statistic. The FBI does not track hate crimes against Sikhs. My mother and those shot that day will not even count on a federal form. We cannot solve a problem we refuse to recognize.”

Harpreet Singh Saini Testimony – A Must Read

At the hearing, Senator Dick Durbin asked why, after 2 years of demands by Sikh groups, the FBI still did not collect data about hate crimes against Sikhs.  FBI Deputy Assistant Director, Counterterrorism Division, Michael Clancy answered that the FBI would be convening a meeting in October to obtain the input of numerous religious groups to design forms that would capture information about hate crime victims, including Sikhs.

THE IMPACT OF THE HEARING

Clearly, the hearing served some important purposes.

1. It showed elected officials the power of Sikh and allied communities. 

Over 400 people attended the hearing, and Senate staffers had to accommodate about 100 people in an overflow room.Over 400 people attended the hearings, including individuals from Sikh, Muslim, and Hindu communities; groups such as the NAACP and the Southern Poverty Law Center; and elected officials including Milwaukee County Executive Chris Abele.

Eventually the line looped around in a switchback because so many people wanted to attend the hearing.

2. It encouraged South Asian Americans to become more politically active. 

This was my first time attending a Senate hearing.  I hadn’t realized that through concerted action, our communities could change FBI policy.  But when they aren’t serving the safety needs of our communities, we can.

It was amazing to be part of an audience of primarily South Asian Americans at a U.S. Senate hearing.  Many of us were first-timers.

3. A Lesson: Who You Elect Matters, and Don’t Be Afraid to Talk to Elected Officials

With election season in full swing, this is a crucial lesson to take home.  It matters who we elect, because they are who we depend on to ensure that federal, state, and local policies serve our communities.

Senator Durbin talked about his ongoing relationship with Sikh Coalition Co-Founder Amarjeet Singh, who urged him to help change FBI policy about collecting hate crime data regarding Sikhs.
Have you attended local, state, or federal government events?  Which one?  What did you think?  How do you think South Asian Americans can get more involved with our government?

“Complainers Are American Heroes”

Complainers are just whiners.

We should make the best of every situation.

Believe that the glass is half full.

There is no point in complaining.

These are all things that many of us believe.


But they’re not true when it comes to complaining.

“COMPLAINERS ARE AMERICAN HEROES”

A wise judge uttered this phrase to me, and I couldn’t agree more.  Here are three tales to convince you that complainers are American heroes.


The Sikh Doctor with the Perfect Case

The wise judge told the story of a Sikh doctor who received a voicemail from a potential employer that the employer, a hospital, wanted to hire him but that his turban would make patients uncomfortable, so the hospital would not be hiring him.

The wise judge and others urged the Sikh doctor to complain, but he refused.  The Sikh doctor responded that he did not want to make things worse for other Sikhs and that he could find another job, so he did not want to complain to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) or file a lawsuit.

The wise judge proclaimed that this was EXACTLY the kind of case that every civil rights lawyer dreams of.  There was hard evidence of discrimination in a voicemail that could be played to a jury.  Such concrete evidence is rare in an employment discrimination case. 

Complaining to the right parties, including the EEOC, could have meant policy changes that would end (or at least reduce) discrimination against Sikh men who wore turbans.

But as Asian Americans, we are reluctant to complain.  Be it because of language issues, cultural beliefs, or just a lack of access to power structures to complain to, we just don’t want to.  Women are even more hesitant–most of us South Asian women were taught to let things go, accommodate others,  and generally not rock the boat.

But complainers are American heroes.

The Political Process

At the Asian American Native Hawaiian and Pacific Islander Diabetes Coalition Conference, Congressman Mike Honda urged attendees to complain to our congresspersons about issues facing Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders.  He said we had to ask the hard questions of our legislators and demand face to face meetings for answers.  This type of political action is essential in getting federal attention for issues facing our communities.

In this way, complainers can help change their communities for the better by tapping into political channels to create change.

Rep. Mike Honda (D-CA) taught us the right way to complain to legislators about issues facing our communities.

At the White House Initiative on Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders conference for Federal Employees, Amardeep Singh, Co-Founder of the Sikh Coalition told us that despite bullies victimizing large numbers of Sikh children in American public schools, the Department of Education reported only a small number of complaints on the issue.

Because they hadn’t heard complaints, the Department of Education did not think bullying was an issue in the Sikh community.

Perhaps as a reaction to our refusal to complain, the Sikh Coalition created FlyRights, smartphone app that allows travelers to quickly and easily complain to the TSA about discrimination.  If you haven’t yet, you should download it here.

Want to complain the right way?  There’s an app for that.

When we formally complain, political and other leaders can no longer hide behind the excuse that they didn’t know there was a problem.  That is the first step to finding a solution.

A Mom’s Tale

These lessons about complaining did not fall on deaf ears.  I decided that I was going to be an American hero too.

If something was wrong, I’d complain.  The right way — calmly, firmly, and offering a constructive solution.

Indian American Toddler goes to a daycare that provides meals to the children, but only provided vegetarian lunches 5 times out of the month.  This meant that Indian American Dad and I had to supplement with home-packed lunches most days of the month.  This took us extra time and wasn’t fair given how much we pay for daycare (it’s a lot).  Plus, when we took the daycare tour, we’d been assured by staff that they had had many vegetarian children, and their food needs were accommodated.

I wrote to the director stating that we wanted the daycare to provide vegetarian lunches, that we paid as much as everyone else and deserved to have our child’s needs accommodated, and that I was willing to work with the daycare to suggest appropriate vegetarian options.

I didn’t know what to expect. The daycare staff seemed reluctant, saying that they did not know if they could accommodate the request, because the children’s menus were fixed.   After some back and forth….

SUCCESS!

The daycare will be providing all of the center children the option of vegetarian meals EVERY DAY!  Not only that, but the vegetarian option will be similar to the non-vegetarian option (e.g. if the other kids are eating pasta with sausage, Indian American Toddler will get pasta with soy sausage or tomato sauce).  Now I’m not the biggest fan of fake meats (actually many of them make me sick and we try to stay away from too many processed foods), but I’ll take it!

If I hadn’t complained, neither Indian American Toddler nor the other children at the center would have had appropriate vegetarian options.

Are You An American Hero?

Your turn.  Tell me a story about a time you complained.  What happened?  Do you think complainers are American heroes?  Why or why not?

Like what you see? Want to read more? Follow me on Twitter @Iammomsblog, follow me on Pinterest at Iammomsblog, or subscribe to I Am Moms to receive posts by e-mail. Follow @Iammomsblog Follow Me on Pinterest

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Women’s Health Townhall at the White House

I’m nervous about the anticipated Supreme Court decision on the constitutionality of the Affordable Care Act.

At the recent Women’s Health Townhall at the White House, I learned that the Affordable Care Act has so much to offer women (and our country as a whole) that I hope it is upheld.  Still, from reports I read about oral argument, it seemed that the justices were leaning toward finding the law unconstitutional. 

That is unfortunate.  Women have much to gain from the Affordable Care Act.  (If you want to hear how the Act affects minorities, read my posts here, here, and here).

Tina Tchen, the Chief of Staff for Michelle Obama and the Executive Director of the White House Council on Women and Girls welcomes the audience.  I was excited to see an Asian American woman represented in the Obama White House.

Secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services, Kathleen Sebelius, speaks to an audience of women.

The audience was almost all women. I was disappointed.  Don’t men care about women’s health?

Here’s what really hit me about the Affordable Care Act and women: 

  • Under the Affordable Care Act, only 20% of health insurance premiums could go to administrative costs and profits, while 80% would have to go to patient care.  Health insurers who violate the 80/20 rule would have to refund a portion of the premium.
  • Currently, insurance companies can reject women for pre-existing conditions, including being victims of domestic violence.  Beginning in 2014, this will be illegal.
  • Currently, insurance companies can charge women up to 50% more for health insurance coverage, at a cost of over $1 billion, annually.  Beginning in 2014, this will be illegal.
  • The Affordable Care Act will make a number of preventive services will be available without copays.  These include well woman visits; gestational diabetes screening; HPV DNA testing; STD counseling; HIV screening and counseling; breastfeeding support, supplies, and counseling; and domestic violence counseling.
  • States will set up health insurance exchanges for those with preexisting conditions to purchase insurance at competitive prices. Coverage will vary from state to state, but the federal law will provide a floor for coverage. Exchanges will also provide an alternative to expensive COBRA coverage for those who have lost a job.
  • Medicaid coverage will be expanded to cover people who are at 133% of the poverty line. 
  • Community health centers will be expanded under the Affordable Care Act.
  • People who are now covered by health insurance are paying $1000 more (per year?) to compensate for others who do not have health insurance.  The Affordable Care Act will alleviate this burden by ensuring that everyone is covered.

I was also pleased to learn that the Affordable Care Act will facilitate race, ethnicity, and primary language-based health data.  The AAPI Diabetes conference showed me how crucial this type of data is in preventing, diagnosing, and treating disease.

Check out these photos for more from the Women’s Health Townhall:

Here’s me, Indian American Mom, in the White House Press Briefing Room (bloggers and journalists got to hang out here before the Townhall).

Bloggers and journalists got prime seats in the front of the room.  If you’re thinking about starting a blog, I highly encourage it.  You may get opportunities like this one.
The panel prepares to speak.  Notice the smartphone love.

Real people spoke about the impact of the ACA on their lives. The woman at the podium, a college student, was able to stay on her parents’ insurance.  The baby pictured got excellent care for multiple serious health conditions, and his mother did not have to worry about lifetime limits on health insurance benefits thanks to the ACA.

A senior citizen describes how the Affordable Care Act closes the Medicare “doughnut hole,” allowing her to contribute more money toward he grandchild’s education.

Valerie Jarrett spoke at the event, then sat right in my row.  We must have a connection.  Check out our last meeting.

What do you think about the Affordable Care Act?  What do you think are the biggest health challenges facing South Asian women today?  Please share in the comments.

Like what you see? Want to read more? Follow me on Twitter @Iammomsblog, follow me on Pinterest at Iammomsblog, or subscribe to I Am Moms to receive posts by e-mail. Follow @Iammomsblog Follow Me on Pinterest

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AAPI Diabetes Conference: A Call to Action

What’s poorly funded, the leading cause of blindness, and costs the U.S. 1 out of every 5 healthcare dollars and 1 out of 3 Medicare dollars?

What disease occurs in higher rates in Asian Americans, Native Hawaiians, and Pacific Islander Americans than in the general American population? 

Can you guess?

You have a hint right in the title…

Diabetes. 

Not only do AAPIs have higher risks for developing Type 2 diabetes than the general population, but they also respond differently to diabetes and treatment. 

I learned all this at a fascinating conference, the Asian American Native Hawaiian Pacific Islander Diabetes Coalition Conference, organized by that group, the National Council of Asian Pacific Islander Physicians, and the Joslin Diabetes Center last Friday.

You can find my live tweets from the conference on Twitter under the hashtag #AAPIDiabetes

Here are 5 reasons why the Asian American Native Hawaiian Pacific Islander Diabetes Coalition Conference was such an eye-opener:

1. DATA IS SPARSE BUT CRUCIAL
This was the most shocking thing I learned. 

The medical community lacks data on AAPI populations, even though data is crucial.  The AAPI community has disproportionately high rates of diabetes. 

Not only that, but our diagnostic considerations and complications are different than Caucasian patients. 

Currently the CDC is doing a study of the AAPI population, but that data won’t be out for another two years.

There is practically no data on Native Hawaiian and Pacific Islander populations, even though they have asked to be studied for years. It may be even more important for them because 8 of the worlds top 10 obese nations are the Pacific Islands nations. As you may know, obesity is linked to Type 2 diabetes.

2. DIAGNOSIS AND TREATMENT OF DIABETES IN AAPIS ARE DIFFERENT THAN CAUCASIANS

Here’s why data is crucial:  AAPI patients are different than Caucasian diabetes patients.

We Look Different

  • AAPIs don’t look like “typical” (read: Caucasian) diabetes patients. We’re smaller in size, so some healthcare providers may not think to check for diabetes because we don’t always have the high body mass indexes (BMI) of Caucasian diabetes patients.  
  • Type 2 diabetes often doesn’t have visible symptoms in the early stages, so detection is challenging, especially if people rely on risk factors that don’t apply to our populations.

We’re More Sensitive to Weight Changes

  • We’re more sensitive to changes in weight. Higher BMIs are associated with diabetes, in general, but even with smaller increases in BMI (that would not be significant for Caucasians), AAPIs have a higher risk for developing diabetes.

We Have Higher Proportions of Dangerous Body Fat

  • Even at the same BMI as a Caucasian person, an Asian American generally has a higher body fat percentage.  
  • AAPIs have more visceral fat, which is the fat that surrounds abdominal organs and that is linked with higher rates of diabetes.

We React Differently to Gestational Diabetes

  • Among Asian American gestational (pregnancy) diabetes patients, particularly Chinese Americans, the babies don’t have the higher birth weights that are typically a result of gestational diabetes.  It is unclear why that is true.

We Have Different Rates of Complications

  • Even though AAPIs experience higher rates of diabetes, they have fewer complications than Caucasian diabetes patients.

Why do we differ in these ways? Healthcare professionals and researchers need more data to understand.

3. DIVERSITY ISSUES AFFECT HEALTHCARE TOO

I was shocked and disappointed that there isn’t more data on AAPI diabetes patients, especially because it seems that every third Asian American (particularly South Asian American) has done research at some time or another in his or her quest to get a health sciences degree.

Why don’t we study our own populations?

One presenter argued that we shouldn’t consider Caucasian diabetes patients the baseline.

What if Caucasians are the outliers and somehow more susceptible to complications from diabetes, for example?

What if AAPIs have better biological coping mechanisms for this disease?

A Caucasian-focused view could cause researchers to overlook this possibility.

Additionally, because AAPI diabetes patients look different than Caucasian patients and because they have different complications, all healthcare practitioners should be aware of these issues to provide the best possible treatment to AAPI patients.

4. HEALTH IS POLITICAL

Do your eyes glaze over when someone starts talking politics? 

Do you prefer to remain neutral? 

You shouldn’t.  Your political activity may be the difference between life and death — or at least health and sickness in our communities.

We all need to be talking to our elected officials to support further research on diabetes in the AAPI community. 

Representative Mike Honda, a Democrat from California, spoke at the event, emphasizing that Asian Americans, Native Hawaiians, and Pacific Islander Americans need to pressure their elected officials to support AAPI health initiatives.  He encouraged health experts in the room should be working with elected officials to create policy.

5. AAPIs NEED TO STICK TOGETHER, BUT WE NEED TO BE SEPARATED

The AAPI community needs to band together for collective action.  This conference was a success because many Asian American and Pacific Islander groups came together to present information on a poorly-studied community.

But from a clinical perspective, and in many other ways, the AAPI community is a diverse group.

We come from 30 countries and speak over 100 different languages.

We have vastly different rates of diabetes, and South Asians lead this group.

One presenter at the conference made the point that data from one Asian American group (e.g. Chinese Americans) cannot be extrapolated to other groups.  Therefore, we need to advocate for more research and funding for all of the different AAPI groups.

THE CALL TO ACTION

The  Asian American Native Hawaiian Pacific Islander Diabetes Coalition Conference was inspiring in that it did not just educate the attendees but also inspired them to act in their communities.

Here’s what YOU can do about AAPI Diabetes:

1. Manage Risk FactorsWe can do lots of things to reduce our risk of developing diabetes:

Manage Your Weight

  • Small changes in weight can significantly decrease your risk of developing diabetes.  
  • I know it is discouraging to try to lose weight when you have a lot to lose.  But even by losing part of that weight, you will gain the benefit of cutting your diabetes risk.  
  • This works the other way too–those 5 or 10 pounds that creep on over the years could hurt you more than people from non-AAPI backgrounds.
  • Here are some healthy recipes to get you started.

Mind Your Waistline

  • In AAPIs, BMI is a poor measure of body fat (which is associated with diabetes risk).  
  • Instead, you should measure your abdominal circumference (a tape measure around the belly, folks) to assess diabetes risk.
  • People who tend to carry weight in their bellies (like me) are at greater risk of developing diabetes.  We can’t spot reduce, but reducing overall weight is a good way to shrink our waists and lower diabetes risks.

Get Enough Sleep

  • Diabetes and sleep deficits are strongly correlated, and if you are the parent of young children I can bet you are sleep deprived!  
  • It’s not clear whether lack of sleep causes diabetes, but it can’t hurt to get some shut eye instead of putting away that last load of laundry. 

2. Take Action in Your Community

Speak Out In Your Communities and Families

  • Public health programs that empower members of the community to teach others about diabetes prevention and management have been successful in many AAPI groups.  
  • In my family and many South Asian families, we typically bond by gathering around the dining table to snack and feast (often on sweets and unhealthy goodies)  Instead, what if we bonded by going for a walk outside?  
  • Instead of bringing something sugary for dessert to a temple, church, or mosque event, why not try bringing fruit or a healthy salad?

Write or Call Your Elected Officials

  • Call or write your elected officials to support diabetes research and education efforts.  The American Diabetes Association has a helpful website that shows exactly how you can take action.
  • Representative Mike Honda (D-CA) urged us all to inform elected officials of the pressing health needs in our community and to insist on accountability.

3. Support Research

  • Many presenters said that AAPIs don’t participate in studies and clinical trials as often as they would like.  Greater participation could lead to better treatment options for AAPIs.
  • Consider participating in studies or clinical trials, taking into account the risks and benefits.

Your Turn:
Have you had experiences with diabetes?  What are your tips for managing it?  How do you minimize risk factors for diabetes in your family?

Like what you see?  Want to read more? 

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How to Choose a Therapist

Asian Americans and Mental Health: Stigma Is an Understatement!

If you’ve been reading my blog, you’ve read over and over again about the importance of recognizing and treating mental illness.  In preparation for my White House visit, I spoke with one doctor who called mental illness the “elephant in the room,” and one of the biggest cost drivers for many other South Asian health issues.

It’s not just South Asians, either.  Mental health treatment is an important issue for Asian Americans as a whole.  At an Asian American Heritage Month celebration I recently attended, Daphne Kwok, Executive Director of Asians and Pacific Islanders with Disabilities of California, emphasized the burden of untreated mental illness on our communities.  She said that many Asian American families do not want to acknowledge disability and don’t seek available resources because of the stigma.  Here is more info on AAPIs and mental illness.

So What Is Mental Illness, And How Do I Seek Treatment?

Mental illness can include things like depression, anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder, schizophrenia, post-traumatic stress disorder, suicidal thoughts, and other conditions.  The good news is, these conditions are TREATABLE! 

You don’t have to live with it or just be strong.  It isn’t all in your head.  Just like a broken arm, mental illness is a real illness that needs to be treated.  And with treatment, you can be a healthier person and a better parent.  In the South Asian community, there is an all or nothing perception about mental illness. Either you are completely mentally healthy (without treatment or only treated in the form of “mental strength” or positive thinking) and a functioning member of society, or you are “crazy” and will never be functional–broken in some irreparable way. In this paradigm, there is no middle ground. The truth is, you can have a mental illness, obtain treatment in the form of medication, therapy, hospitalization (in some cases) and/or lifestyle changes, AND live a happy and functional life. Here is a list of successful people who have battled mental illness

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental illness and would like to seek treatment, CONGRATULATIONS!  Just getting to this point is a huge accomplishment.

Mental health treatment may include a combination of therapy, medication, and lifestyle changes. 

Reader and Mental Health Advocate Seema Nanda Demystifies the Process of Finding a Therapist:

I Am Moms reader Seema Nanda is powerful advocate for South Asian mental health issues.  She’s written this helpful resource to teach readers how to choose a therapist.  

How do I choose a therapist?

The first thing you should do is research. If you’re looking for someone to talk to about the death of a parent, for example, you want someone who specializes in grief. 

In addition, you can also look into different kinds of therapy. For example, some practice cognitive behavior therapy. There are many kinds, so it is a good idea to start out armed with some basic information. 

Another way in which therapists differ is in their education. Some are social workers and some are psychologists. These days, there are people called life coaches, and they also do counseling. Their training and education differs from both social workers and psychologists.

Therapy is expensive. So, another thing important issue is insurance coverage. If you’re a student, it is often covered by the insurance you receive through your college or university. If not, a call to your insurance company will answer all your questions. Often the coverage for mental health is a different percentage than the other medical coverage. Make sure to ask about the deductible, if there is one for mental health coverage. 

If you are uninsured, do some research on the Internet. There are inexpensive options available through your local county. On occasion, individual therapists will charge on a sliding scale according to what you can afford, so be sure to ask and find out from the individual practitioner.

The best way to choose a therapist is to make an appointment for a session. Take an hour out of your day and sit and speak with him or her in person. Feel free to ask any questions you have. It is okay to be nervous or scared. You might also ask about what kinds of methods he or she prefers. This is the only way to get a good sense of whether or not you like the person.
    
If you feel comfortable, you can ask your friends or relatives if they know a good therapist. Many people go to psychologists or social workers for counseling. If one of your friends or relatives can refer you to one, sometimes this is a very good way to find someone who is adept at their job. Remember, though, just because your friend likes a certain person, you might not like them as much.
 
How is talking to a therapist different from talking to a parent or a trusted friend?

Therapy is different from talking to a friend or a parent in a few different ways. 

One way is that a therapist will not discuss anything you say with others unless you have expressed intentions to harm yourself or someone else. This means that you can feel totally comfortable to tell them anything. It can be intimidating and uncomfortable, but if you have a good one to speak to, it can feel safe and cozy. 

This brings us to another aspect of therapy. Trusting the therapist is a really important part of the therapeutic process. Of course, we generally trust our parents and friends. However, when you are speaking to a therapist, you can rely on the fact that they are there to help you with your personal issues. 


When you speak to a friend or a parent, it is somewhat different from talking to a therapist because each person in your life has a personal history with you. Sometimes this personal history can color the conversations you have with them. 


When you speak to a therapist, however, his or her own personal feelings and own personal past stay on the outside of the office. This is not a hard and fast rule. Some follow this rule very strictly and some do share small pieces of information with you.

You can read Seema’s other work at South Asian Parent online magazine here, where she shared her battle with anorexiaYou can also read her advice column, “Dear Seema Aunty” at Brown Girl Magazine here

Seema Nanda is a graduate of Mount Holyoke College, where she studied philosophy and religion. Her interests include reading, films, collage, and the other arts. She enjoys writing for the Desi community in the United States, especially in the area of mental health advocacy. Seema lives and works in Texas, where she was born and raised.

Other Resources
For a South Asian-specific mental health resource, check out MySahana, a South Asian mental health nonprofit, which has a wealth of articles and other resources (including a limited list of South Asian mental health professionals organized by geographic region).   They have a resource on how to find a therapist too.

If you need to talk to someone now, call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).  They’re open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to help with suicidal thoughts and emotional distress.  

Do you have any more to add?  What else do you think we can do to eliminate the stigma of mental health issues?

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